Can you change your way of thinking?

Well the easy answer is yes, we can all change our way of thinking.  The reality is that it isn't easy for us to do so. Let me demonstrate with a math problem (bear with an old math teacher).  I first saw this problem while in college in a problem solving class and it really requires no "high-level" math what so ever.  It just requires changing the way most people are thinking about the problem.  Here's the problem:  In a rectangular room with dimensions 12' X 12' X 30'.  A spider is located in the middle of one wall, one foot from the ceiling. A fly is in the middle of the opposite wall one foot from the floor. If the fly remains stationary, what is the shortest total distance the spider must crawl along the walls, ceiling and floor in order to capture the fly?  The correct answer is NOT 42 feet, it is actually  - - - -



Well I'm glad you chose to read on.  The shortest distance is 40 feet.  Want to know how?  Either work a little more at rethinking the way you look at it, google it, or click on this link:    Spider & Fly
                    Hopefully the link will be active for some time, it's a great visual way to see the solution.

Now the purpose of this post isn't to challenge your math skills or your problem solving skills.  It is to get you to look at things differently. Perhaps differently than you have for awhile.  The things that are important to look at differently are much more important than the spider and fly problem.  The real reason for this post is to challenge you to at least ask yourself, "How do I look at myself?"  This is a HUGE questions and even though others may be able to see the answer clearly for each of us, it's important that we all ask and answer this question of ourselves.

Most of us don't even realize it, but from the time we were small children we were being asked questions that made some assumptions.  From the time we first answered some of those questions our life has been shaped by how we answered the questions as well as how people reacted to our answers.  People's reactions either positive or negative framed the way we thought and even shaped our future. This happened regardless of whether or not we realize it.

Here is one of the questions most kids are asked before they're in grade school:  "So what do you want to do when you grow up?"  Think about that question for a minute.   Is your answer the same now as it was when you were 4, 5 or 6 years old?  Chances are probably not.  The next question is WHY NOT?!?!?!

How may kids do you think answered this question by saying, I'm just going to sit at home and let the government take care of me.  How many answered by saying, I'm going to work for 40 to 50 hours each week (in a factory or restaurant) to make enough money to barely survive financially.  Not that there's anything wrong with either of these, but most people don't see themselves there when they are very young.  So the next question is, "Why do so many people end up doing these very things with their lives with no hope for change?"  Well this is not going to swallow very well, but I bet the reason for most is because they've convinced themselves that this is the best they can do.  How sad.

What convinces people that they can't do any better?  Well maybe me, maybe you, definitely the local media, definitely the way schools are set up and without question our governmental officials to some extent.  There are so many subtle things that happen to frame the thinking, it's almost a shame.  How often does our world encourage people to reach for the stars or to aim high?  Not too often, I'm afraid to say.  For the most part, we're all probably somewhat guilty of contributing to this problem.

Too often, although in subtle ways, we've all probably been guilty of doing something to shoot people's dreams down.  Not by saying you're crazy, you can't do that.  It's much more subtle in fact.  Little things like raising of the eyebrow, voice inflections or just body language that speaks so loudly the words aren't important.  All this stuff says in some way or shape, "you must be nuts, you can't do that".  Other times when people set out to do something that really stirs their soul, they are met with questions like, "how much does it pay?" or "what kind of benefits does that offer?"  All of these things are coming from a single perspective that needs to be changed in order to really set out again in search of our dreams.  

Now after hearing/seeing what some reactions are to our dreams, eventually many people start dismissing their own dreams as unrealistic.  The stop seeing themselves in being successful like they did when they were young.  They start telling themselves what they can't do and forget what they can do.  In most cases if our best friends said the things we say to ourselves, we'd consider them "FIGHTING WORDS".  But for some reason we continue to fill our minds with negative and discouraging thoughts and words. 

Now for the change.  We have to change the way we think. We have to put something positive in place of the negative and discouraging thoughts we have all too often.  The next question is where do we get positive thoughts from?  Well you where you won't get it from TV, or Radio or the people you know what always seem to talk negatively or act pessimistically.  In the words of Zig Ziglar:  "Some people say motivation doesn't last. Well neither does bathing, that's why both are recommended regularly."

Here's a great video that makes a great point:  You think your life is tough?

In order to change our thinking, we've got to change what we put into our mind.  If you can't find positive, inspiring and encouraging sources to make you feel better about yourself, and to encourage you, please ask.  I've got some free resources that I'll point you toward.  Once you start replacing the negative inputs with positive inputs, you are on your way to changing your thinking.  Eventually instead of hearing your own voice telling you what you can't do or what you've failed at, you will start looking at what you can do and what you are capable of. 

So I'll ask the question I started with, "Can you change your way of thinking?"  The answer is YES YOU CAN.  The next question - perhaps the most important question is, "WILL YOU CHANGE YOUR THINKING?"

If you will, then I assure you that a whole new world is waiting for you.  A world that encourages you to dream big dreams, and helps you live them as well.  Remember as Carl Sandburg said, "Nothing happens but first a dream".  If you've lost your dream, it's time to get it back.  Will you?