Decades ago, our founding fathers wrote these words: ". . . endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness" So how are we as a country doing with that happiness part? More specifically how are we as individuals doing with that happiness part? I know, it's a rhetorical question. We can improve on this area dramatically if we want to.
It seems a lot of people seem more troubled, anxious and perhaps even more angry than is healthy. This may be due to our economy, but in reality I think these feelings go even deeper than the economy. Even when our nations economy was great, we still saw many people troubled. The reality is that it is now summer time. Look at what we have to be happy about: a roof over our heads, food on the table, people who love us, work to do, something to work toward. The majority of us are healthy and even if that falters, we have the best medical care in history available to us. So why are so many people so unhappy?
Well first let's look at the words of Thomas Jefferson and his colleagues. Nothing they wrote implied that we have the guarantee of happiness, only the right to the pursuit of happiness. Most people aren't very intentional or purposeful about pursuing happiness. In our current culture some even feel that we should be entitled to happiness and someone should make sure we get it. How sad this is, but even worse is the politicians who all but tell us that they can make us happy. The truth is that happiness is an inside job. We are responsible.
Most people who are unhappy have tried their hand at gaining some sort of happiness. The problem is that we many times don't know how to find or get it. Most of us strive for happiness on our own terms. But if we haven't yet found happiness "on our own terms" it may be time to try something different. Most of us haven't been very strategic or precise about pursuing happiness either. Instead we've been taught by our media (both the news channels and commercials) to seek pleasure through immediate gratification. I've written about the difference between pleasure and happiness before. They are different - - VERY DIFFERENT.
We now live in a culture that constantly reminds us to watch out for something bad. We constantly hear warnings about our food, our automobiles, the sun, caffeine, pollution, climate and almost everything else we do. We hear people gossip, talk about problems, complain, criticize and in general fret about all sorts of other things that are outside their control. One of the few things we truly can control is our attitude. Unfortunately, our culture seems to be overly concerned with bad news. Maybe it's time to change what we're allowing ourselves to listen to. Otherwise there's little question that we will see stress, anxiety and unhappiness continue to thrive in our lives and in our country.
Maybe it's time to become more intelligent and intentional about how we pursue our happiness. We know some people who are generally happier than others. Science actually tells us that the happiest people in our lives consistently do certain things every single day. Let me repeat that - THE HAPPIEST PEOPLE CONSISTENTLY DO CERTAIN THINGS EVERY SINGLE DAY.
One of the things happy people do consistently is practice gratitude. Many of them actually record things they're grateful for. They keep a written record of good things that happen to them or that they see around them. the happiest people insist on healthy relationships. In order to do this, they surround themselves with positive encouraging supportive people. They in essence choose the community of people they are a part of in order to influence their thinking, behavior and attitude. I want to mention a phone message I heard years ago. I returned a phone call to a young man who used to get in trouble regularly. His recorded message said something like this: "I'm making some changes in my life in order to improve myself. Leave me a message. If I don't get back to you, maybe you're one of the changes I'm making."
This is a great example of something else happy people also do. They cut certain things out of their lives. I have a hunch they probably gossip less, listen to bad news less, watch less television, don't associate with negative people, listen to less news broadcasts and in general stay away from negative things that influence so many people. I could be wrong about this, but I bet I'm not. There's a lot of social science that tells us these types of things make a positive measurable difference in personal happiness. In essence these are smart things to do if we want to alter our direction regarding our pursuit of happiness.
Now it's true that most people do something different than described above. Since this includes most people, we call it "normal". It's sometimes considered normal to criticize others, condemn others, complain, gossip and frequently listen to negative media types. The reality is that it has become normal to be miserable, unhappy, frustrated, anxious and even depressed about their situation. We don't have to be normal we do have a choice. The bottom line is that we are better equipped to successfully pursue happiness if we make conscious, intentional smart choices to create happiness in our lives. It's not hard, but it's simple. All it takes is discipline and intentional actions. We can start by making our country happier by following Gandhi's advice: "Be the change you wish to see in the world."
It seems a lot of people seem more troubled, anxious and perhaps even more angry than is healthy. This may be due to our economy, but in reality I think these feelings go even deeper than the economy. Even when our nations economy was great, we still saw many people troubled. The reality is that it is now summer time. Look at what we have to be happy about: a roof over our heads, food on the table, people who love us, work to do, something to work toward. The majority of us are healthy and even if that falters, we have the best medical care in history available to us. So why are so many people so unhappy?
Well first let's look at the words of Thomas Jefferson and his colleagues. Nothing they wrote implied that we have the guarantee of happiness, only the right to the pursuit of happiness. Most people aren't very intentional or purposeful about pursuing happiness. In our current culture some even feel that we should be entitled to happiness and someone should make sure we get it. How sad this is, but even worse is the politicians who all but tell us that they can make us happy. The truth is that happiness is an inside job. We are responsible.
Most people who are unhappy have tried their hand at gaining some sort of happiness. The problem is that we many times don't know how to find or get it. Most of us strive for happiness on our own terms. But if we haven't yet found happiness "on our own terms" it may be time to try something different. Most of us haven't been very strategic or precise about pursuing happiness either. Instead we've been taught by our media (both the news channels and commercials) to seek pleasure through immediate gratification. I've written about the difference between pleasure and happiness before. They are different - - VERY DIFFERENT.
We now live in a culture that constantly reminds us to watch out for something bad. We constantly hear warnings about our food, our automobiles, the sun, caffeine, pollution, climate and almost everything else we do. We hear people gossip, talk about problems, complain, criticize and in general fret about all sorts of other things that are outside their control. One of the few things we truly can control is our attitude. Unfortunately, our culture seems to be overly concerned with bad news. Maybe it's time to change what we're allowing ourselves to listen to. Otherwise there's little question that we will see stress, anxiety and unhappiness continue to thrive in our lives and in our country.
Maybe it's time to become more intelligent and intentional about how we pursue our happiness. We know some people who are generally happier than others. Science actually tells us that the happiest people in our lives consistently do certain things every single day. Let me repeat that - THE HAPPIEST PEOPLE CONSISTENTLY DO CERTAIN THINGS EVERY SINGLE DAY.
One of the things happy people do consistently is practice gratitude. Many of them actually record things they're grateful for. They keep a written record of good things that happen to them or that they see around them. the happiest people insist on healthy relationships. In order to do this, they surround themselves with positive encouraging supportive people. They in essence choose the community of people they are a part of in order to influence their thinking, behavior and attitude. I want to mention a phone message I heard years ago. I returned a phone call to a young man who used to get in trouble regularly. His recorded message said something like this: "I'm making some changes in my life in order to improve myself. Leave me a message. If I don't get back to you, maybe you're one of the changes I'm making."
This is a great example of something else happy people also do. They cut certain things out of their lives. I have a hunch they probably gossip less, listen to bad news less, watch less television, don't associate with negative people, listen to less news broadcasts and in general stay away from negative things that influence so many people. I could be wrong about this, but I bet I'm not. There's a lot of social science that tells us these types of things make a positive measurable difference in personal happiness. In essence these are smart things to do if we want to alter our direction regarding our pursuit of happiness.
Now it's true that most people do something different than described above. Since this includes most people, we call it "normal". It's sometimes considered normal to criticize others, condemn others, complain, gossip and frequently listen to negative media types. The reality is that it has become normal to be miserable, unhappy, frustrated, anxious and even depressed about their situation. We don't have to be normal we do have a choice. The bottom line is that we are better equipped to successfully pursue happiness if we make conscious, intentional smart choices to create happiness in our lives. It's not hard, but it's simple. All it takes is discipline and intentional actions. We can start by making our country happier by following Gandhi's advice: "Be the change you wish to see in the world."
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